Can I encourage you to read, re-read and read again the words of an anonymous Puritan writer? His prayer speaks to my heart and I trust to yours as well.

A Puritan Prayer 

“O God of grace, Thou hast imputed my sin to my substitute, and hast imputed his righteousness to my soul, clothing me with the bridegroom’s robe, decking me with jewels of holiness.

But in my Christian walk I am still in rags; my best prayers are stained with sin; my penitential tears are so much impurity; my confessions of wrong are so many aggravations of sin; my receiving the Spirit is tinctured with selfishness.

I need to repent of my repentance; I need my tears to be washed; I have no robe to bring to cover my sins, no loom to weave my own righteousness; I am always standing clothed in filthy garments, and by grace am always receiving change of raiment, for thou dost always justify the ungodly.

I am always going into the far country, and am always returning home as a prodigal, always saying Father, forgive me, and thou art always bringing forth the best robe.

Every morning let me wear it, every evening return to it, go out to the day’s work in it, be married in it, be wound in death in it, stand before the great white throne in it, enter heaven in it shining as the sun.

Grant me never to lose sight of the exceeding sinfulness of sin, the exceeding righteousness of salvation, the exceeding glory of Christ, the exceeding beauty of holiness, the exceeding wonder of grace.”

 (Valley of Vision, p. 136)